The Importance of Identity Beyond Roles with Nate Green

"It's not about what I do, it's about who I am."

This simple yet profound statement from Nate Green perfectly captures the essence of our recent conversation. As an award-winning entrepreneur who built and sold an eight-figure business, bestselling author, and former police officer who faced heart failure at age 23, Nate has experienced both remarkable success and devastating setbacks.

What makes his perspective so valuable isn't just his impressive resume - it's his willingness to share the raw, unfiltered journey that shaped him. Through our discussion, Nate revealed insights about identity, mindset, and personal growth that can transform how fractional executives approach both business and life.

The Critical Distinction: Your Identity vs. Your Roles

Perhaps the most powerful concept Nate shared was the danger of tying your identity to your professional roles or circumstances.

"What happens when your identity is tied to being a cop and you can no longer be a cop? What happens when your identity is tied to being a husband and the marriage falls apart? What happens when your identity is tied to being a CEO of a specific business and you either change or sell it?"

This is particularly relevant for fractional executives and independent consultants. When your professional identity becomes synonymous with your personal identity, every business setback feels like a personal failure. Every client loss becomes a statement about your worth.

Instead, Nate advocates for a fundamental separation between who you are and what you do:

"Your identity shouldn't be connected to moments in time. This separation allows you to learn from experiences, grow from them, and make yourself better because of them - no matter what's going on in your circumstances."

Reframing "Failure" in Your Professional Journey

When I asked how this perspective applies to business failure, Nate offered a nuanced take that acknowledges both feelings and growth:

"Failure is connected to feelings because people feel like a failure. If we said we don't believe in failures, then what do you do with the feeling that you're a failure? You're going to feel like a failure in moments."

Rather than denying these feelings, Nate suggests acknowledging them as part of the process:

"Accept something as a failure so you can reframe it into a learning experience. If you don't do the first step, you're basically putting lipstick on a pig."

For fractional executives navigating the inevitable ups and downs of client work, this balanced approach creates space for both emotional honesty and growth. Your business may experience setbacks - but that doesn't define you as a person.

The "People First, Money Will Come" Philosophy

During our conversation, Nate repeatedly returned to the mantra that built his eight-figure business: "People first, money will come."

This wasn't just a feel-good slogan. It was the foundation of a business that grew to Inc. 5000 status four years in a row without spending a dollar on advertising. As Nate explained:

"We were 100% referral-based. It's all about making sure that if Bradley's in front of me, and I might be able to charge him extra, but he's going through some life stuff - let me take care of him. Let me spend a little more time with him. Let me figure out how he's really doing."

This approach requires sacrifice - sometimes in time, sometimes in money. But the long-term results speak for themselves. When you genuinely prioritize people over profit, you build relationships that become your most powerful marketing asset.

For fractional executives, this means:

• Being willing to go the extra mile for clients
• Not always charging what you could just because you can
• Taking time to understand clients' lives beyond the scope of your work
• Making decisions based on what truly serves the client

Breaking Free from Limiting Beliefs

Another powerful thread throughout our conversation was Nate's passion for helping people break free from what holds them back - whether limiting beliefs, past trauma, or false narratives about who they are and what they're capable of.

"Every time when people have fear or resistance or are stuck, there's always something holding them back further down," Nate explained. "We go back to wherever it started, and then we work to reframe it so they can move forward and take different actions for the rest of their life."

For many fractional executives, these limitations might include:

• Beliefs about what you deserve to earn
• Fears about raising your rates
• Impostor thoughts about your expertise
• Narratives about what's possible for "someone like you"

Nate's approach involves both acknowledging these limitations and actively working to reframe them:

"You can have as much positive mindset about your future, which is incredible. But you have to also know what mindsets to let go and reframe so they don't become those parachutes holding you from chasing after the right goals."

Finding Purpose Beyond Achievement

When I asked Nate how to avoid the common trap of successful-yet-unfulfilled entrepreneurship, he offered insights that challenge conventional approaches to goal-setting:

"I think the people that are driven and motivated, the people that are really chasing the best version of themselves, are not settled with a certain achievement."

Rather than focusing solely on external achievements, Nate suggests looking inward to understand your deeper motivations:

"You always have to ask why behind everything. Great, you want a Lamborghini. Once you get it, why did you want it? You didn't want it because it was just a cool vehicle."

This perspective shifts the focus from what you achieve to who you're becoming in the process. Success isn't defined by hitting particular milestones, but by continually growing into a better version of yourself while maintaining proper boundaries and relationships.

The Built Unstoppable Process

Nate's insights aren't just philosophical - they're practical. Through his Built Unstoppable mastermind, he's developed a concrete process for helping entrepreneurs discover their authentic path:

1. Deep self-discovery: Using assessments and exercises to uncover your strengths, cognitive patterns, and personality traits
2. Identifying your fuel: Understanding what truly motivates you and addressing past experiences that might be affecting your drive
3. Setting your lighthouse: Establishing a clear vision for your life's work - what Nate calls your "deathbed goal"
4. Working through limitations: Systematically addressing the patterns, beliefs, and distractions that hold you back
5. Building your corner: Surrounding yourself with the right people who support your authentic journey

The results of this process can be transformative. Nate shared stories of participants who restored marriages, sold businesses that no longer aligned with their values, or made complete career pivots - even in their 50s.

"One gentleman said, 'Nate, I've been living the last 30 years as my father, and I am not my dad.' He's literally selling his business and chasing after a completely different future."

Applying These Insights to Your Fractional Practice

How can you apply Nate's wisdom to your work as a fractional executive? Here are some practical takeaways:

1. Separate your identity from your business outcomes: Remember that client losses, revenue fluctuations, and project challenges are experiences, not definitions of who you are.
2. Examine what's holding you back: What limiting beliefs might be preventing you from raising your rates, pursuing higher-level clients, or scaling your practice?
3. Put people first in every interaction: How can you prioritize genuine relationship-building over short-term gains in your client work?
4. Clarify your "lighthouse": What's the long-term impact you want to have through your work? How does your fractional practice contribute to that vision?
5. Show up as the true you: As Nate challenged in his parting words, "How are you showing up today as the true you? How are you living your life to the fullest today with what you have in front of you?"

The Final Word: Beyond Roles, Beyond Results

What struck me most about my conversation with Nate wasn't his impressive achievements, but his relentless focus on what truly matters - becoming the best version of yourself and helping others do the same.

For fractional executives, this perspective offers freedom from the endless chase of clients, revenue targets, and industry recognition. Your worth isn't determined by what you achieve, but by who you are and how you show up each day.

In Nate's words: "Your life is not defined by this. I will not be defined by heart failure. I will not be defined by divorce. I will be defined by what I choose to do with it on the backside."

That choice - to define yourself by your response rather than your circumstances - may be the most powerful freedom available to us all.

Mylance

‍This value-added article was written by Mylance. Mylance takes your marketing completely off your hands. We build the marketing machine that your Fractional Business needs, but you don't have time to run. So it operates daily, growing your brand, completely done for you.Instead of dangling numbers in front of you, our approach focuses on precise and thoughtful input: targeted outreach to the right decision makers, compelling messaging that resonates, and content creation that establishes trust and legitimacy.To apply for access, submit an application and we'll evaluate your fit for the service. If you’re not ready for lead generation, we also have a free, vetted community for top fractional talent that includes workshops, a rates database, networking, and a lot of free resources to support your fractional business.